Relational life and leadership coach James-Olivia Chu Hillman is an enthusiastic advocate of life-changing conversations, which may just turn out to be uncomfortable, but necessary. Join us as we talk about right relationship and what that means for leadership.
James-Olivia Chu Hillman (they/them) is a Relational Life & Leadership Coach and a mediator, facilitator, and enthusiastic advocate of necessary, uncomfortable, and life-changing conversations. They work with people who want more joyful connection and less suffering in their relationships with themselves, the people they love, and the world. James-Olivia has a passion for asking questions that make us squirm a bit and point us back to who the fuck we are and what we care about most.
3 Key Points
- A place of discomfort is one where we can grow.
- Being impactful means disrupting the status quo.
- Leaders need to recognize that not every team member feels empowered to share their thoughts. We need to invite people to share and ensure their safety and comfort when sharing.
Quote
“The status quo is not okay for everyone. Being compliant and well-behaved and going along to get along doesn’t necessarily work. Where we’re going to have impact, we’re also going to have to misbehave.”
What We Talked About
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- 01:17 – What prompted your interest in “Right Relationship”?
- 05:50 – On finding connection after the contentious end of a relationship
- 07:52 – How do your new ways of looking at relationships provide more connection and less suffering?
- 10:20 – Why is asking uncomfortable questions important?
- 12:00 – Does the entrepreneurial experience with professional discomfort provide benefits in our personal lives?
- 16:15 – On their “Disobedience School” and misbehavior
- 17:40 – On the expectations of oppressive systems and the need to misbehave
- 19:40 – How can you be a leader if you don’t know what you want?
- 21:45 – Does a focus on Right Relationship give leaders more personal clarity?
- 23:00 – How does having Right Relationship change organizational culture?
- 27:50 – On the pitfalls of avoiding contentious conversations
- 32:50 – How can leaders create a culture of equity in every room?
- 35:20 – What does it mean to be in a relationship with the world?
Actionable Tips
- Cultivate relationships: impact cannot happen in a vacuum.
- Have conversations with those who think differently than you.
- Identify what you want and move toward it.
Resources Mentioned
- Find James-Olivia online at Inquisitive Human and on Instagram.
- Article mentioned: White Supremacy Culture by Tema Okun
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Ursula Jorch, Host of The Impact Interviews
Ursula Jorch is a business coach, speaker, and podcaster who shows women leaders how to turn their businesses into profitable agents for lasting change, global impact, and a force for good in the world.